Wednesday, June 20, 2007
summary.
Went to school on monday to meet up my project group members and get started on the service project. It isn't that all difficult.
Then went with Ken to Jurong gym. And just because he wanted to meet Someone, he stopped my treadmill when I was cooling down. Idiot.
And then ended up, things didn't go according to plan, and screwed up his day.
poor thing.
I have this friend. Sometimes I try not to believe that he's using me for his benefit and in fact, not being concerned for me. But at the end of the day, it always seems like that.
Then yesterday, I stayed home. Recuperating from the musche aches, lack of sleep over the few days, and absence of cash. It was rather fruitful. Had a wonderful dinner with my family.
It only took 30mins to finish our huge meal. That's Singapore? haha. Rushing everything.
Its coming back again. Oh no. I don't want it. The season has begun again. HELP! Its like a wave of destruction, seducing first, then crushing ruthlessly at the end. What seemed good eventually turned out worse than hell. And the world claims they learn a lesson from it. Maybe that's just an excuse for covering up their stupidness in the first place, and maybe even giving them another ticket to get another go all over again in the name of learning.
Then after a few lessons, their heart gets too bruised and torn, so much that they cease to feel anymore. Such that they have to use their minds instead of their hearts. Thats why some people are really such "jerks and bitches". Not to mention, finding a substitute to fill that broken hole, then realise that it doesn't fit, and trow in the towel, tearing it out again just as it already started to grow some roots. Guess what, now the hole gets torn even worse, and even more difficult to find something that fits and fills perfectly.
Then, using so much of their mind, they totally miss the one their heart tells them is his/hers, and end up with something their heart doesnt say is right, but the mind accepts as it is, due to many other perverted sources that tell them is right.
And so, marriage really becomes a lifetime of hell.
Let me assure you, you don't want a lifetime of "just ok". you'll get sick of it, really sick. So please wait.
Your heart has to tell you first, then you also need your mind to balance it out.
If it came from your mind first, you're not being true to yourself, you're settling for something that you subconsciously talked ot thought yourself into.
Then again, if you think you'll never get to be with the one you love, deal with that wrong belief. If you dont, you will suffer. Usually is your root of low self esteem. Don't swing to pride or ego-ness, but remain in balance.
Life is really like a pendulum. You swing from one extreme to the other uncounsciously, thinking the opposite is right. Finding the equilibrium and staying there is of utmost importance. Some ways to get there are by learning experiences, or by listening to the right advice. It's like your teachers always tell you, learn it right, then you wont have to learn from a mistake of failure. Either way, be wise, and humble. Finding that equilibrium is half the battle won. You trully win if you can stay there. haha!
I just hope people around me have their eyes opened to see.
You won! 1:34 PM
