Wednesday, March 28, 2007
I've been in bed since 12plus after being chased by my dad. He nags that I've been sleeping too late because of doing useless stuff on the computer. Oh well, all I did was just start playing a game that my mom didn't like. It took me just 3days to complete the game though. Oh well..
I completed my dad's website yesterday night, finally. And he came into the rom just as i finished it just to scold me saying he didn't appreciate that effort because it was bad fo my health. Yea, I kinda agree.
Why do I stay up so late? I guess as a kid, I remember being forced to sleep early while parents or the adults only coud stay up late for tv or something. Then camps and chalets were the ultimate release. I could stay up all night just for the thrill of it. Of course, playing around with friends too! That was FUN.
So the late nights begin. There was also Mirc, then Icq, and now MSN. It was fun to socialise or chat with friends, and soon the talking dragged on till later hours. That also led to the expansion of the scope we use the net. We found game sites, video sites, music sites, and bl0gging also came into the picture.
Basically, friends mostly only go online in the night. TV soon became less attractive to the internet. Why wait for the tv serial day by day when you can find the whole episode on youtube? haha. right? And you can choose when to watch it as you please.
Alright. I kinda agree it's bad to sleep late, even though I wake up late the next day. If I sleep at 4am, I'd wake up at about 2 or 3pm.
Another reason would be there's nothing to do in the morning. See, everybody's in school from 7am to about 2pm. They reach home around 3. That's the earliest you'll find friends free. so why not wake up then. haha. Morning is also the time where the world's awake. Cars driving to and fro. I'd rather be sleeping and not bothering about the noise. It's much quieter if I'm awake in the wee hours of the night. (Btw, quiet not equals peace. Hate it when dad always tells me to turn down the music for some peace.) And it's cooling too. Usually.
With a life like this, I hardly leave my room nowadays. And my room is so small, with a mostly blocked window. And its taking a toll on my eyesight. Of course, computer to blame too. Sometimes trees are good in Singapore because they give shade. But it leaves so much less pace to see the beautiful sky. So many people in Singapore are getting myopia and stuff. We need more space to see further. haha. Singapore is too small, and everything is within strict limits that even in vision, most people have become shortsighted. We need more long sighted visionaries. Also wide view visionaries. People are becomming too self focused. They look at the mirror too often, rather than at other people.
Back to the topic. My work table hasn't been used for work since a long time ago. I've been doing stuff on my bed. Almost everything. So now, I just literally sit and lie aroud all day, and as a result, grown really fat. haha. I need to get more active. Picking up a sport is one thing. But finding the people to play with is another thing. Seems like everyone's favourite is movies, pooling, kboxing, or towning. Once you say sports, "ahhh..lazy larhh...".
I feel tied down, pressed down, whatever it is.
Mom's been complaining that our family isn't like a family, its more like a hotel. And sister's been effectively siamming everything from family time, outings, and agreements for a long time now. As always, her stubborn attitude. And she's influenced brother quite abit too. Dad then always has been leading us in family decisions since young, but until sister had enough courage to start speaking out against dad's decisioins. She's some prick now. Giving judgements and somewhat sarcastic remarks about others now and then, but then doing the same thing herself. Now dad and mom have trouble leading the family in decisions. I guess that's growing up. As the seedling pushes trough the soil, it demands for more share of the light and water.
Dad has always been saying things that because of a "change in plans" have been postponed numerous times and then never done in the end. Sister's the one to blame I guess. If it's not "cool" to her or its "lame", she'd give no support. And somehow as the only girl I guess, maybe also because of her rebellious nature, parents try to please her more and succumb to her comments. Of course, it's not always about her. Sometimes It's just dad.
It's really shitty sometimes. I see the family condition and try to compromise. Isaac doesn't usually have much of an opinion so he just goes along. But it all just takes 1 person. My sister, to be in a bad mood or refuse to go along, the outing will not be satisfying or complete. I hate it when after compromising and sacrificing my wants for a general good, somebody just takes for granted and sabotages it all with no sense of concern for others at all. Then not only are you not recognised for the sacrifice, instead you are coined as being stupid, gullible, and look like the loser. Sacrificing for nothing. Then say, this person feels like a loser and thinks he should not sacrifice anymore. The other way he'd win. So he becomes the sabotager and doesn't bother about the others. It just produces more insensitive people in the world right? Are conflicts good? I would rather have a no conflict world. But that takes love. Lots of love. Compassion for others. Love not just for selfish wants, but for others. People say conflicts in relationships are good. spices it up, makes you become better friends. I think it's stupid. Who want's conflicts. Still, the solution is not to supress them.
Okay. i stopped here because mom came n and told me to sleep. and i was ready to sleep too. haha
continuing. i've just woken up. its 2.17pm. slept well.
I think the invention of the light bulb has really altered the lives of everyone. Our natural light bulb, the sun, was only meant to give us light for 12 hours a day, and then let us rest for 12 hours in the night. Since God created that, it would be the healthy way to sleep and wake up. 12 hours each. because once the sun set, you couldn't see anything. Butever since making good light became so easy, we humans start to extend our day. Doctors reccomend at least 8hrs of sleep a day, but I feel it's not enough. Try sleeping enough, say about 12hrs. you'll feel healthier the next day. I realise it improves eyesight too. When you're tired ofver a long period of time, you start to see blur, think blur. blur eyesight can cause blur thinking, slow reaction because of a very important diminished sense. I can see better already. haha
I want to cut my hair today. see if i can manage to get it done. haha. Kelong this weekend. don't wanna bring my long irritating hair there. I was thinking of shaving my hair..hmm.. maybe i should..
You won! 2:43 AM
