Saturday, January 13, 2007
well well...its new year..
last year, the BEST thing that could happen happened..
and so did the
worse thing..this year..
man.. man..
what a way to start the new year..
its hard to cope.. but i'll manage i guess..
pains me even till now..
its like you're pumped with a drug for few weeks..
then all of a sudden it becomes scarce for an unknown reason..
you crave it and passionately seek it, trying to seek understanding why the supply stopped.
but no matter how you think and ask, you don't seem to be able to understand why..
then finally you hear the reason from the supplier that it's been on hold for awhile to supply another source..
then shortly after say that your supply will totally be shut off..
now you realise you are in some really deep shit..
you question yourself why you took it in the first place..
you answer saying, i knew it was the best thing and right all the while..
ahh..weird example..it isnt really drug. but the story is similar..
and then u realise later, that because you asked the supplier, it might had make things worse..it was as if like you didn't trust the supplier.. but you reasoned it'll be worse of letting your mind wander and coming to wierd conclusions.. so you asked. and now you think if it was wrong to ask in the frist place. that certainly leaves you in a deeper mystery than before. and in deeper trouble. maybe shutting up is really the best solution? who knows.. or there might have been something more than that..who knows..
see how it leads on..
really sad.. extremely..
somethinig interesting did happen the next day after the truth of the heartbreaking decision..
i suddenly met a whole bunch of my friends.. even primary school ones..
i don't know why it happened.. i mean i didn't see them at all for many years or months, and they all appear in the same day. not all, but enough for me to notice..hmm..
anyway,
Why have words become so cheap..
to me, they're serious, and should be protected with life.
but its okay. i'll forgive..
thats so ME..
You won! 5:47 PM